2 Corinthians 12:10

Lately I have felt like instances at work have really helped me notice my weaknesses in ministry. I always hear "focus on strengths and not weaknesses", which is true, but I also think that it's important to look at areas where I lack and try to better myself. I've been that type of person my whole life. Everything is black & white, if there is a problem you just fix it. That doesn't work with everything though.

Some areas I'm not that great in are working a fax machine older than I am, getting finger prints off the stainless steel appliances in Rock Island, maneuvering the 15 passenger mission van thru 10 inch wide alleys , and understanding street slang such as "dawg" and "playa". Those areas are not a big deal and can be fixed, but I'm finding that some of my weaknesses in ministry are not easy solves. One area that has been especially challenging for me lately is patience with promiscuous teenage girls. This is ironic because some may say I seem strong in this area. The key word is "seem". I feel like I say all the right words to the girls caught up in this lifestyle. I feel really bad and get emotional when I realize the true source of their insecurity such as sexual abuse or lack of father involvement. The outer Chandy works well with this subject, the inner Chandy struggles. I struggle to not be annoyed by the way that some of them dress (they don't leave much to the imagination) or the way they throw themselves at boys. What's interesting is that I don't hold the boys to the same standard in my mind. If they are a little too flirty, I just chalk it up to the fact that they are a teenage boy. Now, before you start worrying about me banning all girls from Rock Island, you must know that this is only a battle of my mind and I can feel the Lord transforming it more and more every day.

I could sit here and list all my other struggles but then I would have a blog as long as the ones on lukesfoodforthought. (Sorry Luke!) Ha. Something interesting I read tonight in a little devotion book really encouraged me and I hope it does the same for you,

"Why does God use our weaknesses? Because when He does, He gets all the glory. If God only used your strengths, other would look at you and either be jealous (Why didn't I get that talent?) or discouraged (I'll never be like that!). But when God uses you in spite of your weaknesses, it gives people hope. They realize "God could use me too!" Your weaknesses are not an accident. God deliberately allowed them in your life for the purpose of demonstrating His power through you."